Confessions

1. I keep wanting to like red velvet cake but I'm always disappointed. I recently bought some red velvet cake ice cream and I'm sitting here eating a dish of it wishing it was just plain old chocolate.
2. Driving in traffic seriously brings out the worst in me. I often drive too fast and I sometimes call people rude names when I'm driving. 
3. I used to bite my nails to the quick when I was a kid. At some point in my later teen/early adult years I quit, but sometimes when I am nervous or scared I will still chew on them--I just don't bite them down like I used to. 
4. Of course I think my husband with his full head of thick, handsomely graying hair is the best,

   

   Some guys that make bald look good.

   but I have some celebrity crushes and I noticed recently that there are an inordinate number of older bald men among them: Patrick Stewart, Michael Jordan, Sean Connery, Peter Gabriel, Terry O'Quinn. There are also a fair number of Brits on the celebrity crush list. I am kind of a sucker for an accent.
5. I don't dislike them, but I think The Beatles are overrated and I can only think of one song by Elvis Presley that I even like ("A Little Less Conversation", in case you are wondering.)
6. Speaking of music, I am notorious for mishearing lyrics. For example, the first time I heard "Stairway to Heaven", I thought Robert Plant was singing "and there's a wino down the road." Also, it wasn't until this past summer that my brother-in-law set me straight on "Kyrie". All these years I've been singing it "carry a laser down the road that I must travel..." Go ahead, laugh. I'm ridiculous, I know.
7. I am impatient. I punched a hole in my older boys' bedroom ceiling yesterday. Not because I was angry, but because they have a dropped ceiling and I wanted to know what's under there. I should have waited until we had the money to replace it with drywall, but like I said, I'm impatient. Now they have a hole in their ceiling and no way for us to fix it until we get our tax return. Oops.
8. Sometimes I can hear a mouse in my ceiling. It creeps me out a little, but not nearly as much as bats. Or head lice.
9. I am rubbish at stress management. I often over-react or freak out. Case in point:
10. I put mayonnaise on my hair and left it there for two hours on Saturday night.

Whaaa? Yes. You read that right. Mayonnaise. "Why?", you ask. Because even though I had two different people check my head (including the school nurse at my kids' school) and assure me that I was/am lice free, I couldn't stop itching. So, Saturday I had had enough and I decided what could it hurt? Supposedly if there are any lice, the mayo smothers them but you have to leave it on long enough to work. The Minnesota Department of Health says eight hours. The nurse at school said two. I figured two would be enough to give me some peace of mind and maybe at least moisturize my scalp so I wouldn't be so itchy. Plus I couldn't really bear the thought of spending eight hours smelling like macaroni salad. 

Any real mayonnaise will work. I just happen to prefer Hellman's so that's what I had on hand. If I ever do this again I'll just get the cheap stuff.

I slathered it on all over my hair. I just took globs of it and rubbed it into one section of hair at a time making sure to cover all my hair and scalp thoroughly. I covered my head with a shower cap to hold in the heat and prevent messy mayo drips and set my timer for two hours--plenty of time to play some Trivia Crack and watch some Netflix with my boys.

I had to shampoo my hair a couple of times to get all the mayo out, but let me tell you, I was amazed by how silky and shiny it made my locks.

After shampooing, I just combed it out with a nice wide toothed comb because it was a little tangly still and I didn't want to break or tear my hair. 

I have used an apple cider vinegar rinse on my hair before too and it also helps with shine. And the smelling like a salad thing.

I just labeled my jar and I'll keep it in the fridge until next time. If you don't want to put cold mayo on your head just let it sit at room temperature for 20 minutes or so. You aren't going to eat it so I would guess you don't really need to be worried about salmonella.

After combing out my hair, I blow dried it since I was going to bed and didn't want to sleep on a wet head.

Here it is the next day. I took a car selfie for you since cars always have good natural light. See how shiny it looks?

 

And here is one more. And my final confession: I think I have great hair.

So what do you think? Would you ever use mayonnaise on your hair? I think I will use it again the next time I need a deep conditioning treatment. Hopefully there never will be a next time that my kids get lice.